Listen to the sound of water

christina

Water is the source of life. All the creatures cannot live without water. Water was once pure and clear.
Please close your eyes and follow my step closely. All you need to do is to bring your ears to listen and use your hearts to feel. With a soothing sound, a river is running towards unknown distance. You can see all kinds of cobbles in different shapes and feel the joy of fish in the water, which is sparkling with soft sunshine. Along both sides of the river, green trees are rustling in the breeze and overlooking the beautiful scene: there are boys in the clear water, all in folds of light and shade.
Open your eyes. It is exceedingly beautiful and joyful, isn’t it? With the development of science, technology and economy, however, it is passing into history. Water is not what it was. You will be prepared for the opposite stunning scene: nearby a factory lies a river, which is filled with black liquid like ink and some stuff disgusting. It is impossible to see through the water –no, the liquid, and it is difficult for you to step toward the river, for it is so stinking and unbearable.
Now, it is raising the alarm that water pollution has been a member of most severe environmental problems. We all know that over two thirds of Earth’s surface is covered by water, less than a third is taken up by land. But for today, that is just a ideal description. As Earth’s population continues to grow, people are putting ever –increasing pressure on the planet’s water resources. In a sense, our oceans, rivers and other inland waters are being “squeezed” by human activities. Apart from this, water quality has given rise to a crisis. Take China for example. Water quality recorded in 2005 at 411 surface water quality monitoring sectors along China’s seven major river systems –the pearl, Yangtze, Huai, Yellow, Haihe, Liao, and Songhua rivers –reached a level of 27 percent, or poor, meaning it wad unfit for human use.
How critical it is! So, have you spared your time, even a little time, to ponder on it? Have you come up some questions and tried to figure out the answers? But now, I have.
Should we let water pollution go bad to worse?
Should we ignore the death of fish because of polluted water?
Should we neglect the survival of our next generations?
Should we wait to have our alive and kicking global village become a lifeless and dead planet?
No, absolutely not!
Let us work on it together until trees can absorb nutrition from clean water.
Let us work on it together until fish can swim in clean water.
Let us work on it together until next generations will be nourished by clean water.
Out of question, only if we work together to fight against pollution, can we save the water, save plants, save animals and save ourselves. And only if we draw the lesson from the past and take action at present, can we make a better future.
Finally, listen to the sound of water with your heart again. It warns: everyone, do something on it, otherwise, the last drop of water on earth will be just your tears.

admin

1 please improve the following:
All the creatures cannot live without water
nearby a factory lies a river, which is filled with black liquid like ink and some stuff disgusting
How critical it is! So, have you spared your time, even a little time, to ponder on it? Have you come up some questions and tried to figure out the answers? But now, I have.

2 wordy. Delete all redundant words. Be concise.

admin

1 good beginning, the sharp contrast achieves its effect.

2 well-structured.

3 good to use some rhetorical devices such as parallelism.

4 still a bit awkardto read.

郭红艳

I like the first para very much,the   part of  discribing"Listen to the sound of water" is beautiful!