Parents and child

向娅宁

Yesterday my mother telephoned me and asked about my recent conditions. I told her some of my academic and social activities. When I told her that I was so exhausted from result of taking part in the sports games, she encouraged me to join more; when I described the frenzied experience to have a meal with a group of friends, she reprimanded me being too outgoing and unaware of the potential danger with strangers. Well, maybe always, there’s gap between my parents and me. If I told the same thing to my peers, we will co-complain the “damn” sports game, and we will co-recall the wonderful memory to be exalted all night. As the former immature daughter, I will blow off for sweeping away my happiness. Thing changed however. This time, I said yes and words that were consistent to what she had said. Clearly and undoubtedly, mom was more talkative during the call. I don’t why. Maybe I have gained something that even had not known it before.
How to deal with the relationship between parents and children?
To be filial towards parents is one of the Chinese old virtues. In the past, children tended to obedient to parents, as to express their love. Nevertheless, time has changed. Highly-educated and immersed with uncountable new and fresh ideas, children are more independent. They no longer can stand to be only a cute pet or just a pappy to their parents.
I don’t know whether I was a competent obediently daughter. Since I entered into the elementary school, I have warned to be docile and diligent. I was excluded to the housework; I was deprived of the computer; I was constrained to do extra assignments… For a long time I believed that all these are my duty, are my responsibilities.. Blindly and uncritically, I followed the road that has already paved by my parents, safely and leisurely. Therefore, under the guide of my parents, I had no protesting, no complaining, even, no grunting. The relationship between us was best , so as to speak, at the climax through my 21-year life.
Nevertheless, soon, it came to the slope.
Usually, I found more and more friends dyed their hair or began to talk about marriage or career. I didn’t mean to be envious of their dyed hair or money made by doing small business. The thing that really matters is they did think about these, on the contrary, I didn’t, even once a little. My grades of exams were high enough, but what anything else did I know? No! Nothing! I knew nothing. I was still a baby, said what parents told; did what parents asked. Where were my personal opinions? Where were my fantastic creativity?… A lot of questions rose in my mind. The more suspicious I was to my parents, the more discomfort will be found between us. At last, I became, as they said, rebellious.
I would never satisfy anything that they did for me. The present they bought on my birthday did nor in my flavor; the changes, they gave to me, were far from enough. How to describe the subtle change in this period of time? They were angry and beyond figuring out solution. I, whether or not under the influence of adolescent Hormones, was impatient and belligerent to everyone.
Fortunately, this did not last long. Everything turns better when I entered the university.
Their departure after arranging everything well made me feel so weird. I should have been more than happy, but I didn’t. What’s the life would be like without them? A mixed motion, the first in that time, made me missing them, to care whether they would be well at such age without children staying along.
Well, the college life is terrific. I, to be frank, indulged my greedy heart. Competing in a job-searching for air-conditional, what’s more, playing truant to watch a game, and etc, are all my deeds. I know, however, I am not a wild bird flying without direction and limitation. I am a kite, which stays high and can be higher if I want, with a string firmly fixed to the ground. No desire is non-restricting.
From time to time, I let myself stopping for a while, thinking about my life and parents. They fed me up and gave me a healthy body, establishing the most solid foundation for my later life. Now, I was almost an adult. How can I still be childish enough to attribute all my misfortune to them? Or criticize them not be considerate enough. It’s high time for us, children, to look after them, to tolerate them, to love them. There should be, inescapably, disagreement or quarrel. Please take this into accounts: the different views towards the movement of society. Think that you were young, how pride you would be to have such a father full of wisdom. So why you now think he is totally stupid? Well, we shouldn’t be stumped by the out-dated perspective of them. Yet, we should value their experienced suggestions, as most of the time, we are incline to be impulsive.
As a matter of fact, there is, maybe all the time, not an absolute solution to improve the relationship between parents and children. From a baby to an adult, we took a lot from them. Therefore, no matter what our old parents do, please listen to them, although the words seem, maybe, ridiculous to you. Cherish the care that they give to you, no one is so generous enough to sacrifice everything without asking for repay.
Learn to be an eligible child.

Cinderella

I've never had the chance to be obedient, for my parents were too busy to take care of me. I grew up by myself. And I envy you for you've been showered with parental love, whether they are in forms of complaints or compliments.